"O' Brother"

O’ Brother…

An older brother is in turmoil right now..
He is 33 years of age…
Sad to realize that he has fallen in a feeling of betrayal again…
I say again because this feeling started in his younger days…
A trauma that is difficult to let go…
And a recent situation has triggered him to fall back in the feeling of being victimized…
But during these moments a lot of things will come as a surprise…
Moments that will become opportunities for my brother and me…
That at these points in our lives, a brother could indeed uplift a brother’s spirit…
Within months of struggles and aches…
Only an hour of lunch between brothers could ease the pain…
With that hour of conversation, my brother is ready to face the world again…
Prepared to triumph and conquer his destiny and the abundance that he deserves…
Ready to challenge his fears and slay the dragons in his mind…
What propelled him to swing to the positive side at such a fast pace?
I have come to realize that there are indeed a lot of changes to the present lives that we hold…
In the norm, we would just ignore and pester each other up…
And that, it is a sign of weakness to allow you to be beaten down by a situation…
However this situation presented us a new fate…
It showed me a chance to kindle a brotherhood that I’ve longed for…
Where rivalries are put aside…
And that just Love and Support could move brethren…
That expressing Love is not at all corny as how we think it is…
Instead Love could give Courage and Hope to the imminent future of our Lives…
It is by Love that we are hurled to the Light, From the Darkness that makes us feeble…
The Happiness that it brought me…
Thank you O’ Brother for this chance…

"Of Nostalgic 10 Years"

Of Nostalgic 10 Years…
4 April 2007

Four corners of a room with a busy feel
Reminders of triumph of 10 years
Colorful, beautiful and comforting
Wonderful moments frozen by such keepsakes
Mementos smiling back from wooden and steel frames
Of loved ones from the past and the present
However cheerful it should feel
These things just stare
Without a voice, or warmth or scent
Good ‘Ol Silence becoming a gloomy company.
10 years it has been
Of days of struggling and just living
The chosen path endured and achieved
A long way from the innocence departed
And in a waking chance you realize
Important parts of life is put to sacrifice
Wondering where they have gone
Or rather not choosing over them was worthwhile
The value of thy self transformed
In an identity unrecognized
10 years past.
Now being mindful of the precious things
Where shall it lead? 10 years forward...

FEAR

Those feelings that stop us from doing what we need to do. I’ve plenty of it to be honest with you. My fears come from deep rooted beginnings; and it was molded since I was a child. And I bet you’ll agree. As a child we’ve been programmed to fear a lot of things. And we have been carrying it in our present age right now.

But it makes us wonder why other people can do what we fear to do. How can they act so brave and courageous? What makes them so different from us? Sometimes we just answer like “iba sila sa akin” or “may pera sila kaya ganun.” We just let it go and kill our dreams because we could not face our fears.

But mind you those people who succeed in what they do have experienced the same fears as ours. The only difference is that they chose to face their fear and just go for it. And the fear becomes a feeling of liberation because they triumphed over what they thought was scary.

Fear can be defined as:

Fantasized
Experiences
Appearing
Real

We are in the times where fear is not at all a life-threatening consequence. Unlike millions of years ago where Cro-Magnons treat fear as a signal of threat in their lives like if a saber-tooth tiger is nearby or a wild beast is in front of them. People in this age experience fear and are being triggered by their thought or mind. Mostly we scare ourselves by fantasizing or thinking of the negative results of what we have to do. But fortunately we are also the ones who can put a stop to the fear that we are going through.

We can choose to be sensible. Rather than focusing on our negative imaginations. We can face the actual facts and bring ourselves to a state of clarity and peace. Focus on your intentions when you decide to do things, imagine what you will feel when you accomplish it. It might be frightening but just do it anyway… you’ll never know, you might be great at it!!



Reference: “The Success Principles” by: Jack Canfield

Is your Job your Passion?

How many of us Pinoys can really say that our Job is our passion? Unfortunately most of us are not really doing what we want to do. We were brought up believing that we can only improve our lives by working in a company that can provide our basic needs. But most of us don’t really Love our Job and just living our daily routine at work to get that paycheck twice a month. At the end of the day, we produce mediocre actions and mediocre results.

Surveys will show that a lot of employees are not really passionate about what they are doing in their everyday work. And if you come to ask them, they are passionate on something else. Isn’t this Self-Deception? We keep doing what we are doing, but in the end it doesn’t give us Happiness. And what does that give you? Burn-Out…

So what’s stopping us from pursuing what we like? Concerns will arise like:
“I don’t have the means to do this.”
“I will have to sacrifice a lot of things.”
“I fear that I will fail.”
“My family will disapprove.”
“I am already comfortable, I cannot let go of it.” Etc. Etc.

Successful people have undergone the same fear and challenges. But what made them successful is that they chose to go beyond those limiting and defeating thoughts. They had focus on doing what makes them happy and what gives them fulfillment in life. Success was just a consequence from their happiness.

“The Secret to Success in Life is making your vocation your vacation.”
-- Mark Twain

Successful people never get tired of doing their job, because it is their source of happiness and reward.

And so stop fooling yourself. Be honest with yourself and find that passion inside of you. Look for the thing that truly gives you fulfillment and happiness. Challenge yourself and believe that you can be successful in that passion as well. You are born to be Great and you deserve all the Greatness in Life!!!

A Guide To Recognizing Your Saints

It has been a long time since a powerful moviebiography has touched my soul. The casting was really magnificent and full of raw emotional power. Robert Downey Jr. is I can say one of the best actors there is in this generation. Shia LaBeouf (Sam Witwicky of Transformers) was at par (if not the best) in the cast as well. Wonderfully written and directed by: Dito Montiel.

Here’s the plot of the story (courtesy of Wikipedia):
Dito (Downey) is a successful writer in Los Angeles. One day, he goes back to visit his childhood home, Astoria, New York
because his father has suddenly become very ill. Memories of his childhood end up in jail or dead - and being swept back to his past in the summer of 1986. His
friends include Laurie (Rosario Dawson), his
childhood sweetheart; Giuseppe, reckless, destructive, and possibly insane; Mike O'Shea, a Scottish boy who dreams of becoming a musician; Nerf, a friend who eventually calls Dito back; and Antonio (Channing Tatum), a confident, volatile boy with an abusive father.


Sometimes we resolve our bad situations by escaping or running away from it. We feel that the only way we can breathe is to go to a new environment and start a new life there. As effective as this would seem, we never really settle the root of the crisis. We may achieve great success and betterment in our lives but deep down inside there are wounds that has been killing us for a long time already and have been carrying for so many years.

“Sometimes the only way to move forward is to go Back.”

That was the tagline of the movie. Simple and straight. I guess why the movie struck me so much is that I have been in the same state of mind before, and the only way I really rose from my grave wounds and hurts was to truly embrace and face my deep rooted pains.

And so I courageously faced my demons and dragons. I settled the score with my dad and relatives. Found my peace again with my long time friends. But most importantly I forgave myself and found myself whole again.

Let me have this opportunity to say thank you to my living saints, my Dad, (my Mom, who is having a blast now with God J the true saint for me), my great siblings and wonderful nephews, and my wonderful friends. You have been a source of inspiration and a good reason for living… Life is indeed damn Great!!!

Heal your Life

During my past jobs in the past years, I’d get colds once in a month or two. Being a workaholic really has its negative effects in our bodies. Getting sick is always a sign that there is something wrong with how our mind is functioning, or how it is operating (or sometimes we deliberately wish to get sick just to have an escape with the busy life that we are living in). We work very hard to achieve our tasks but our tasks just seem to pile up every time; leaving us with so little time to relax and take care of our body.

We might not be aware of this but the state of our mind or thinking causes our sickness or diseases.

To give you an example, Colds is a sign that our mind is experiencing too much going on at once, or we have a mental confusion or disorder. I normally get colds when I have a lot of things to accomplish in my hands. I am overwhelmed by too many projects and the anxiety of achieving all the target dates. As a result, I end up in bed feeling cranky and sore but no other choice but to lie down and get a good rest.

Yeah multitasking is a great deed but sometimes it leaves us to be unfocused with our deliverables and priorities. I am sure that most of us are juggling more than one priority in our lives and by not accomplishing all of them we end up unfulfilled and unsatisfied with ourselves. Sometimes we just have to pause and regroup to keep us on the right track.

I discovered how Great the mind is again, that it is actually the source of my disease and it can be the remedy to my dis-ease… Going back to Colds, since the cause of this is confusion and disorder in my life, I see to it that I STOP and meditate to keep me on track. I follow a mantra, that goes:

“I allow my mind to relax and be at peace. Clarity and harmony are within
me and around me.”

Once I get that relaxation, all solutions and activities to my priorities falls back in sequence and gives me sight on how to accomplish everything. Sometimes anxiety gives me a roadblock but I fight it and let all the fear stop and just focus on myself for awhile. This process doesn’t take that long, you can a lot an hour of your day to do this, and know that you deserve this time of break. And in so doing, the clarity flows through me and the struggle stops leaving me less colds every year or should it attack me I get to heal myself fastest time possible.

Here are some of the common diseases that we experience, its cause and how you can help heal yourself by the power of your mind or simply changing your mental pattern:


Stomach Problems:
Probable cause: the stomach is the entity of the body that holds nourishment and digesting ideas. Problems arises in this area when there is dread, fear of the new, the inability to assimilate the new.
New thought pattern: I digest life with ease. Life agrees with me. I assimilate the new every moment of every day. All is well.

Teeth Problems:
Probable cause: represents decisions. Longstanding indecisiveness. Inability to break down ideas for analysis and decisions.
New thought pattern: I make my decisions based on the principles of truth, and I rest securely knowing that only Right Action is taking place in my life.

Blood Pressure:
Probable cause: Represents joy in the body, flowing freely
HIGH: Longstanding emotional problem not solved.
LOW: Lack of Love as a child. Defeatism. What’s the use; it won’t work anyway.
New thought pattern:
HIGH: I joyously release the past. I am at peace.
LOW: I now choose to live in the ever-joyous NOW. My life is JOY.

Heart: Represents the center of love and security.
Probable cause:
PROBLEMS: Longstanding emotional problems. Lack of joy, hardening of the heart. Belief in strain and stress.
ATTACK: Squeezing all the joy out of the heart in favor of money or position, etc.
New thought pattern:
PROBLEMS: Joy, Joy. Joy. I lovingly allow joy to flow through my mind and body and experience.
ATTACK: I bring Joy back to the center of my heart. I express love to all.

Addictions:
Probable cause: Running from the self. Fear. Not knowing how to love the self.
New thought pattern: I now discover how wonderful I am, I choose to love and enjoy myself.

Cancer:
Probable cause: Deep hurt. Longstanding resentment. Deep secret or grief eating away at the self. Carrying hatreds. What’s the use.
New thought pattern: I lovingly forgive and release all of the past. I choose to fill my world with joy. I love and approve myself.

Venereal Disease:
Probable cause: Sexual guilt. Need for punishment. Belief that the genitals are sinful or dirty. Abusing another.
New thought pattern: I lovingly and joyously accept my sexuality and its expression. I accept only thoughts that support me and make me feel good.

Defining Success

these are some of my favorite advice adoptations from remarkably accomplished people.. they're a source of inspiration and mentorship, it is a good thing that they were able to share their ways on how they were able to achieve their success in life. if you want a good compilation of the advices of these remarkable people, look for the book Success edited by: J. Pincott..



For some poeple, success is simply defined: it's the act of accomplishing something one has set to do. But finishing something isn't always the same as being succesful at it. For many, success also implies meaningfulness and magnitude. Almost every person has his or her own definition of success - and many of these definitions are anything but definite.


it is worthwhile to think about what success means to you and what it means to others. and it's up to you to decide if you want the latter to influence the former.

to me success is the ability to LOVE and to have COMPASSION. it's
the capacity to experience joy and spread it to others. It's the security
of knowing that your life has meaning and purpose. it is a sense of
connection to the creative power of the universe. it's also the ability to
fulfill your goals. it's the progressive realisation of worthy
goals. it's also the expansion of happiness. when you have all that,
then material success in terms of material acquisitions and comforts and luxury,
follows as a by-product.

--deepak chopra, writer, medical doctor, and CEO of the Chopra
Center

I'd rather be a failure at something i enjoy than be a success at something i hate..

--goerge burns, actor and comedian

Enthusiasm is one of the most powerful engines of success. when you do a thing, do it with all your might. put your soul into it. stamp it with your own personality. be active, be energetic, be enthusiastic and faithful, and you will accomplish your objective. nothing great was ever achieved without enthusiasm.

--ralph waldo emerson, poet and philosopher

i thought i was going to make crazy cartoons for the rest of my life. i didn't think i'd ever get paid for it, didn't think i drew well enough, but i knew it made me happy.

--matt groening, creator of the simpsons

my boyfriend was moving to manchester and wanted me to move, too. it was during the train journey back from manchester to london, after a weekend looking for a flat, that harry potter made his appearance. i have never felt such a huge rush of excitement. i knew immediately that this was going to be such fun to write... i didnt know then that it was going to be a book for children - i just knew that i had this boy, harry. during that journey i also discovered ron, nearly headless nick, hagrid, and peeves. but with the idea of my life careering round my head, i didn't have a pen that worked! and i never went anywhere without a pen and notebook. so, rather than trying to write it, i had to think it. and i think that was a very good thing. i was besieged by a mass of detail and if it didn't survive that journey it probably wasn't worth remembering.

--joann kathleen (J.K.) rowling, writer

it [e-mail] was a hack - a neat thing to try out... it probably took four, five, six hours to do. less than a day spread over a week or two - when i had a spare moment.

--ray tomlinson, inventor of email, computer scientist

don't make friends who are comfortable to be with. make friends who will force you to lever yourself up.

--thomas j. watson, founder of IBM

there is a tide in the affairs of men, which, taken at the flood, leads on to fortune; ommitted, all the voyage of their life, is bound in shallows and in miseries, on such a full sea are we now afloat, and we must take the current when it serves, or lose our ventures.

--william shakespeare, playwright, in julius ceasar

our goals can only be reached through a vehicle of a plan, in which we must fervently believe, and upon which we must vigorously act. there is no other route to success

--pablo picasso, artist

give me a stock clerk with a goal and i'll give you a man who will make history. give me a man with no goals and i'll give you a stock clerk.

--james cash penney, fonder of J.C. Penney

a man has to have goals - for a day, for a lifetime - and that was mine, to have people say, "there goes ted williams, the greatest hitter who ever lived."

--ted williams, baseball player

my goal is simple, it is a complete understanding of the universe, why it is as it is and why it exists at all..

--stephen hawking, physicist

consult not your fears but your hopes and your dreams. think not about your frustrations, but about your unfulfilled potential. concern yourself not with what you tried and failed in, but with what it is still possible for you to do.

--pope john xxiii

goals are dreams with deadlines

--diana scharf hunt, aphorist

Think your day in Advance!

Did you ever watch your colleagues at work about how they start their day? People watching has always been an entertainment for me (..mind you, it’s a great form of amusement especially when coworkers play pretend early in the morning..) and I get a good kick for the laughs that they give me.

I remember this colleague of mine who’s very quirky and gets to be so OC (Organized Chaos, not Obsessive Complusive) in the early stages of the morning. you’d find him rushing sometimes at the start of the day setting up his laptop in his desk, and in a minute he’ll be going through all the files in his desk and as if he found the file that he needed, he’ll leave them where he picked them up and then go to the pantry to get his coffee… When he goes back to his chair, he’ll pick-up the newspaper and starts reading the “entertainment” section. After which, he’d open his internet explorer and browses through his Friendster account, hotmail, yahoo mail…and then opens up his MS Outlook, browsing through his emails… and then finally gets his planner and then writes down his To Do List... and by the time he starts his first task for the day, its almost Lunch Break… And I think to myself “WOW!” What a way to be Organized and Productive!! NOT!! (I’m sure you’d think I wasn’t productive as well coz I just watched the whole morning.. well that was part of my plan for the day… I planned to have fun …)

But you see it is such a waste of time, not only for the person doing it but you are robbing the company of time and production as well! (I’m a Manager, I’m concerned about the company, Not!!! Well I’m concerned about the figures and the pressure to deliver them on time.. that’s for the company too…)

So this guy is supposedly a support for our team and clearly he supports me on getting my laughs everyday. But then again, seriously speaking, the goals of the company will not be met with this kind of time management. Tendencies will be the deliverables will not be given on time. I’m sure you’ve witnessed a lot of people in your work area who pretend that they are busy to seem that they are working hard. But looking at it objectively they didn’t do squat.

What I normally do when a day comes is that, I visualize my TO Dos the night before. What clothes to wear for the next day, what tasks to accomplish and achieve for the next day. What would be very effective is before you close your eyes and doze off to sleep is to write down your To Do List and rank them in terms of priorities; targeting the most difficult task first thing in the morning so that everything else will be peanuts for you for the rest of the day.

And as you do this, you will notice that your day becomes smooth and easy. We’d be more productive and efficient that it gives us more fulfillment and happiness for the day.

But don’t get me wrong I PRETEND as well, usually nearing the end of the day where I flip through my files pretending to read them, but actually just having fun putting them from one place to another and just return them to where they previously are. Or pretend to call for a meeting but just gossiping and talking about each other’s life. You see I have the luxury to do this because my major tasks for the day have been accomplished already…

So think in advance… gather your thoughts, organize your actions in your head for the next day and as you wake up and prepare for the day, you are already programmed to accomplish what you want …

Reversed Paranoia

Paranoia, those disturbed thoughts that are lurking in our minds, the feeling of anxiety and the excessive emotions of fear. Did it ever occur to you that at some point in your life (or I hope to God that its not every point in your life..) you have felt these emotions? That you feel the people around you is plotting something against you or to do you harm? Suddenly your life seems to suck and appears to leave in a awful end? Most probably (or not, if you are not human..) you might have been in this kind of dump at some point or another…

What if we try to reverse that thinking? To try to think that the anxiety we feel will lead us to a better end? Imagine how much easier it would be once we think that those people who try to plot against us or the negative circumstances will be just become instruments to make us achieve something better? Suddenly, those obstacles that we face are not seen as another “Oh, this is a crappy life” but we’d see them as opportunities to grow, to change and to succeed.

Was there a part of your past that you think you failed but because of that situation it opened another door for you or has become a blessing because it gave you a new opportunity to run after what you like?

One of the most tragic parts of my life was when I worked in a local IT company and the President was clearly not happy about me, did not trust me enough and didn’t believe that I can accomplish my functions. I was martyrishly (is that even a word?) working long hours and still have to study when I reach home, and just for the President to make me feel that I wasn’t good enough. I was really unhappy and after a year I decided to resign without a security of a new job.

But that circumstance gave me a new opportunity to do something that I do like. It gave me a chance to travel other countries (which I was dreaming to do) and have the best vacation of my life. And when I finally spent my last money, I decided to come back to the Philippines and work again. Guess what? Found a new job and it gave me better compensations and a lot of room for growth. Now that company opened a lot of doors for me because till my position now, I am using the experience, the knowledge and the network that I’ve gained.

That a*s of a President was really a blessing in disguise because he gave me a push to reassess what I want to do in my life… Honestly speaking I wanted to hate him till my dying days but how he became an instrument in my life, I Super Duper Love Him!!!

And so kids, we have a choice to become “inversely paranoid.” No matter how we dislike a person or a circumstance, let us be paranoid that they can become instruments for our greater being. We can treat every negative event in our lives that it can give us equal benefits in the long run… (let me share you a secret, this is how those little people with big successes thinks, clever aren’t they?)

i've always been the opposite of paranoid.
i operate as if everyone is part of a plot to
enhance my well-being...

--stan dale

The 18/ 40/ 60 Rule:

Have you ever heard of this rule? Well again, stumbled into another chapter of a book (that I’ll be recommending soon once I’m done with it…) and it gives me a laugh because I find it funny at the same time so painfully true…

It goes something like; when we were 18 we worry too much about what other people thinks of us, and so we do the dumbest things (or not do what we like) just to fit in and appear to be cool; and when we reach 40, we don’t give a damn what anybody will think of us; then we reach 60, where we find out and realize that nobody’s been thinking about us at all. tragic...

Funny isn’t it? I think I might have been in that kind of crap when I was younger and, ok ok, most of the time, frankly because I wanted to please my boss, my company, my family, my friends and maintain a reputable status in society. We become very self-conscious, very restricting and watch ourselves all the time coz we don’t want the people around us to think otherwise and destroy the reputation that we’ve built.

(say it with me) its becoming so tiring already and sometimes we just want to scream and shout, dance the silly chicken dance, and laugh out loud and not to give a damn about what other people will think!! And just be who we really think we are, the way we should be…

But this might come as a surprise for you, people around us doesn’t really think of other people that much because they are also busy worrying about what other people will think about them…

Of course we pass on judgments, we build impressions toward people the way we see them.. and these people also build judgments and impressions towards us that we don’t like.. and we in turn pass again judgments and impressions towards people that we don’t like.. and people that we don’t like pass judgments and impressions towards us…. and if they are really thinking about you at all..they are wondering what you are thinking about them… Ya dah..ya dah..ya dah.. see its a freakin vicious cycle and we are all caught up in it…

So why do we keep allowing ourselves get tangled up in that dumb cycle, where if we look at the results, it is not even giving us any good results. It is really a big waste of time.. and it is not helping us achieve the goals that we intend…

I have been adopting a very simple saying, a motto if you will and I am gonna write it down in my slum book, together with my crushes, favorite color, favorite food, what do I want to be when I grow up, etc.. etc… and it goes something like:

“WHAT OTHERS THINK ABOUT ME IS NONE OF MY BUSINESS..”

Let’s think about it, we waste time worrying what other people think about us and jeopardizing what we really want, sacrificing our happiness, disregarding what really matters in our lives… where we can make ourselves busy by thinking about how do we achieve our goals, how do we hit that target, how else we can attain a bigger sale, how we can be able to get that guitar lessons, how we can add our skill set.. and basically how do we become successful doing what we really like…

Besides trying to please and patronizing other people is way so NOT cool anymore and in this new generation, people wants REAL people… that’s why reality TV is such a HIT.. get it?